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tv   Jimmy Kimmel Live  ABC  October 30, 2012 12:00am-1:05am EDT

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good morning. quick update on sandy's progress. . progress. it continues to churn into maryland and we continue to see intense wind and rains out there, especially to the west where the snow is coming down and the heavy rain, rain bands to the south. the rain will continue to lift. we'll to get soaked. lock at some of the wind gusts, still gusting to 30 or 40 miles per hour, so we're still looking for tree line damage in the
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overnight hours as temperatures con to fall. much more in an update coming up in one-half hour. let's get you back now to nightline. reporting hundreds of people trapped inside their homes, narrow barrier, low-lying barrier island near ken dart in new york city. floodwaters recreeding but some berms, sand berms that were reekted along the south shore here intended to slow or prevent waters from going into long beach, they dissolved under the pounding surf and the rising tide, floodwaters expected to reach eight feet high here in long beach, hearing reports of people stuck in their homes where the water came in from the north on the bay between here and main part of long island. and from the ocean. there is also a report, according to nassau county authorities of at least one fatality here on long island. that is the latest from long island, just outside of new york
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city here tonight. >> thank you to ron in the middle of a blackout. next up, historic rescue in the raging sea. a capsized ship and the helicopter pilot battling 50-mile-per-hour winds to save those aboard. let's see if we can get one past the defense. hut! go! here it comes! right on the numbers! boom! get it! spin! oh, nice hands! chest bump. ugh! good job, man. nice! okay, halftime. now, this is my favorite play. oh! i'm wide open. oh, fumble. fumble. don't want to fumble any of these. [ male announcer ] share what you love, with who you love. kellogg's frosted flakes. it's up... and it's good! good?! they're grrreat!
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welcome back to this special hourlong edition. i'm cynthia mcfadden at abc news headquarters in new york city. live coverage of the superstorm battering the east coast.
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jimmy kimmel will begin in another half hour. the storm lashing the seaboard amid gale force winds and giant storm waves and incredible drama played out on the open sea today. it was a high-stakes helicopter rescue after a replica of a 200-year-old ship sailed straight in the wrath of the storm off the coast of the carolinas after a grave miscalculation by the captain who thought it would be safer at sea than in port. abc's matt gut man has the story from elizabeth city, north carolina. >> reporter: its final journey began last week as it headed toward its winter port in st. petersburg. the majestic three-masted tall ship made its debut in "mutiny on the bounty" and ready for its closeup in "pirates of the caribbean "and used as a training ship. this is what it looks like when it's buffeted by rough waters.
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but even before it left port in connecticut, the bounty changed its course abc news learned. the captain tacked east hoping to avoid the brunt of hurricane sandy, the captain facebooked his reasoning. saying "a ship is safer at sea than at port." but 20-plus waves and gale force winds battered the ship causing it to lose power. the update on facebook "bleak." the crew abandoned ship. the crew got the sos call at midnight but it would take hours to muster a rescue pehelicopter. it took seven e hours for the chopper to get to the sea due to the high winds. they found the "bounty" crew 100 miles offshore, bobbing like human corks, waves topping 20 feet. in this raft, you sea their faces peeking out. with the chopper battering 50-mile-per-hour winds, their fuel burning fast the first
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coast guard diver is lowered down. with the pilot fighting to hold steady, fearing 30 feet above the water rescue swimmer pulled each survivor into the water. >> i jumped in, i heard you needed a road. >> reporter: towed them through the waves to the basket lowered from the chopper. survivors hoisted one at a time. >> this is swinging really bad. >> i was tired after six and then we went straight over to the next life raft that had flee more people. >> reporter: 14 people total plucked from the mountainous waves and two-hour flight back to land. >> as we left the scene, some started to get emotional, realizing that they had left shipmates behind and that we were still looking for them. >> reporter: two sailors were ma missing, including the captain. the chopper headed back. it was not the only ship caught in the perfect storm. five cruise ships ensnared in
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the violent wind and waves. they were seeking safe harbor. passengers on the disney fantasy tossed around, water sloshing over the decks, storms slamming, ter ti terrified passengers told to stay in their rooms. david and esther with near an end of an idyllic caribbean cruise when they got stuck in the storm. >> doors began to slam shut and open. >> reporter: they captured the ordeal on videotape, outside 12th floor window, rough seas. inside their cabin, total chaos. >> i opened the door to the room and a mother was coming down the hall crying and hystericalhyste room is in shambles, i think is the way she put it. i went around the corner and some glass dhoors opened into enter into a pool area, the glass was shattered. and that was the most traumatic
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part. >> reporter: the ship did manage dock safely in florida, to compensate guests for the wild ride, they were given a 25% discount on their next cruise. we felt the power of those waves this morning. sandy nearly 300 miles away from our location in north carolina's outer banks, but teachero teacherous. we were setting up on a dune, we thought out of harm's way. our producer swept off her feet, the waves engulfing us. we were both wet but okay. maritime safety experts told us that cruise ships should be large enough to safely navigate the heavy swells of a storm like sandy but when a 7,500 ton cruise liner was battered by heavy storms, it sank, capsizing with into sight of shore. >> our thanks to matt gutman, not a day to be on the ocean. we turn to dan harris in connecticut, right now a double whammy of a high tide and a
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powerful storm surge is causing floodwaters to rise to perilous levels and fast. dan? >> reporter: good evening to you from stamford, connecticut. we're at the moment of truth here. high tide in new york city was at roughly 9:00 eastern, here in southern connecticut, right about now. as we said, the moment of truth. let me show you something, the houses, long island sound we've been watching the water lapping up at the houses all day. as you look at these pictures, let me give you some good news and then some not-so-good news. good news, interestingly, water has gone down over the past hour or so because the storm surge really hit several hrs ago at the same time that it was hitting manhattan. and that is apparently stronger or was apparently stronger than the force of this high tide. so, that is some good news, the water going down. the not-so-good, unnerving news, is that the governor here held a
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news conference a short while ago and issued, his words, some katrina-like warnings to the thousands of people in this state who he says are marooned in their homes tonight after failing to heed his request to evacuate. thousands of people, he says, and he had a stark message for the people, he said the government cannot most likely rescue you tonight. your only choice is to go to the highest level in your house and try to ride it out. he said do not, very specific and stark terms, do not try to wade through the water or swim through the water. you will be putting your own life at risk. basically he told these people, as i said, just try to ride this thing out. and as we said at the top of the discussion, moment of truth here in connecticut, the governor predicting we'll see a catastrophe the likes of which this state has never seen before and we'll know more in the morn wheth sun comes up and reveals a perhaps unfamiliar and unpleasant landscape here. >> thank you for that.
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let's hope the governor is wrong. some parts of new england seemed to have escaped the worst the storm and even though residents braced for the worst the governor of massachusetts says most of that state was spared but many of the southern coastal towns still felt sandy's wrath. including westport where abc's john schifrin joins us with more. >> reporter: good evening. the good news is that high tide passed and water levels have gone back down into the ocean, you can see it's still churned by sandy. now, earlier today, we saw storm gusts, winds up to 85 miles per hour, just a few hours ago this area was completely flooded by six-foot storm surge that came crashing down over the ocean. now, to give you an idea how powerful this storm was, where we're standing right now used to be a completely clear road. it is now covered by inch wes o sand and huge 20-pound rocks that were thrown in by the ocean. now, a lot of the residents here
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decided to evacuate here on the beachfront but if you look off in the distance, some blocks, and decided to stay and in this hour they have the power on right now. sin th >> thanks to john schifrin. midwest braces for sandy's impact and bill weir comes to us from a wind-whipped lake erie. [ male announcer ] this is the age of knowing what you're made of. why let erectile dysfunction get in your way? talk to your doctor about viagra. ask if your heart is healthy enough for sex. do not take viagra if you take nitrates for chest pain; it may cause an unsafe drop in blood pressure. side effects include headache, flushing, upset stomach, and abnormal vision. to avoid long-term injury, seek immediate medical help for an erection lasting more than four hours. stop taking viagra and call your doctor right away
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and welcome back to our special storm coverage. we've just confirmed tonight that the storm surge is beginning to recede here in new york city, good news. for the latest overview of what is happening, we have meteorologist jeff smith from our new york local affiliate wabc. good evening. >> reporter: good evening. just a devastating storm in the new york city area. we had record storm surges, some places had water levels that they haven't seen in over 200 years, including hoboken, new jersey, the battery in lower manhattan. water several feet above where the water went during irene last summer and that is flooding the subways. that is a multibillion dollar disaster in itself. incredible storm. a lot of people here talk about the hurricane of 1938, a
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benchmark that hit long island in '38. this storm had pressure or intensity at that level, same league as one of the hurricanes in american history and it moved in a path that was so rare, it moved out to sea and then it backed into the coast and moving off to the west right now and the track, future track will take it into parts of pennsylvania and not only storm surge by winds over 90 miles per hour. we had fatalities in the new york city area because of trees falling on cars. we had a firefighter who died when a tree fell on a fire truck in this area. just an incredible storm and look at the path. it's going to move through buffalo, pittsburgh, very high winds in those areas. even blizzard warnings for part was west virginia higher elevations expecting one to two feet of snow. it's all about the great lakes getting the wind.
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erie, michigan in particular with the long fetch coming down the lake could have to 20 to 25-foot waves crashing into chicago and gary, indiana. a storm we haven't seen the likes of in recorded weather history and this part of the country, in the northeastern part of the country, both in terms of the expanse and intensity. >> thank you, jeff, well-pred t well-predicted. we knew it would hit but didn't know quite so hard. the evacuation in manhattan, the effect of the blackouts taking a steep toll at nyu hospital. the backup generators failed after the power wnt out, forcing evacuations of patients including infants. we're joined by our affiliate wabc's kimberly richardson at the scene at the hospital. what can you tell us, kimberry? i think we have lost the connection but we are going to
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try to reestablish that for you. meanwhile, we're going to, while the east coast is getting pounded by sandy tonight, she's making her way inland as we heard jeff tell us, toward the midwest where it promises to wreak even more havoc in the days to come where my co-anchor bill weir is live in erie, pennsylvania. tonight the storm is whipping up there. what can you tell us? >> reporter: this is unbelievable, of course, we're so used to doing this on the atlantic or on the gulf of mexico but here it is, my first freshwater hurricane. this is lake erie tonight. we are in erie, pennsylvania, midway between cleveland to the west and of course, buffalo to the east. they are recording wind speeds up to 65 miles an hour as far west as cleveland tonight. as jeff was saying, 20 to 25-foot waves in the great lakes, including lake michigan and of course, we've seen this
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down south, the hardy surfers who try to catch a few of the tasty waves and they are doing that in lake erie today, surfing the great lakes. we heard about it in southern california, today it was true. but this is a serious, deadly storm here. this far west, as it is along the coast. already 150,000 people without power in ohio, hundreds of thousands in pennsylvania as well. hundreds of flights cancelled from chicago o'hare to detroit, all throughout the midwest. halloween postponed, schools closed, whoa! as things calm down back east, now the midwest braces for the wrath of sandy. unbelievable. >> stay safe out there. looks like quite a storm. of course, the middle of the country is also home to many of the critical swing states and next week's presidential election and with on the seven days to go before voting day
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this storm is just about the only thing that could slow down a race this tight. both candidates have put their official campaign events on hold while the storm rages. abc's jake tapper reports from the suddenly quiet campaign trail. >> reporter: good evening. president obama was supposed to hold a rally here in orlando, florida, but hurricane sandy made other plans for him. president obama pulled candidate obama off the campaign trail today, pulling a no-show at his own orlando, florida, rally to race back to the white house to monitor the hurricane. >> this is going to be a big and powerful storm. in the wake of harsh criticism of the president flying to a rally in vegas the day after the benghazi libya diplomatic post was tacked the president took no chances today. the white house release two photographs of the president being briefed on the hurricane and he came out to the briefing room to warn americans to heed their local and state officials and to underline what is truly
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important. >> i am not worried at this point about the election, i'm worried about the impat on families and impact on our first responders, the election will take care of itself next week. >> reporter: no doubt the election is being impacted by the storm. both candidates planned to spend the final days of the election crisscrossing battleground states and instead, they are now laying low. their campaigns cancel a combined 30 events since saturday. the one in orlando and another one youngstown went on without the headliner. form eer president clinton and vice president biden praised the decision. >> he said i got to go back right now, the storm is getting out of hand, i got to handle it and i said mr. president, that is the right call. >> reporter: romney squeezed in rallies in av on lake, ohio and davenport, iowa before pressing
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pause on his campaign. >> hopefully you're and prayers will join with mine for people in harm's way. we love our fellow americans. we wish them well. >> reporter: this is already by some measures the closest election since modern polling began in 1936 with the canada dades averaging 38% to 48% tie since september. and into this perfect storm of an election comes this storm, slicing a path through battleground states, north carolina, virginia, ohio and new hampshire, potentially impacting early voting. and who knows where the recovery from the storm will be one week from tomorrow. thus, the candidates are trying to project leadership. >> speaking today with the national weather service and folks at fema as they prepare for the the landfall of a very dangerous hurricane. >> reporter: tougher task perhaps for the candidate who doesn't run the federal government. now with president obama in washington, d.c., you may wonder why i and the rest of the press
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corps are in orlando, florida, the bottom line is it wasn't safe for our press charter to fly back to washington. we're not exactly air force one so we're sitting here waiting for president obama to decide when he's going to resume his time on the campaign trail and we'll catch up with him there. >> thanks to you, jake tapper. at least it's not raining. "good morning america" will have all of the latest storm updates in the morning. we're always online at abcnews.com. stay safe, america. jimmy kim el is next.
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tonlt on jimmy kimmel live. >> if i was in charge i have would national coming today on halloween if your parents freak out, just kidding it's a costume. i'm just dressed as lady gaga. >> kevin james. >> ah! >> ezra miller. and unnecessary censorship. >> ezra miller. and unnecessary censorship. >> mitt romney said president it's oysternomics 101. you start with a u.s. senator named ben. by helping restore thousands of acres of oyster beds, he kept hundreds of oystermen on the job... which keeps wholesalers in business... and that means more delivery companies... making deliveries to more restaurants... which hire more workers. and that means more oystermen. it's like he's out here with us.
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he's my friend, ben. i hope he's your friend, too. i'm ben cardin, and i approved this message. and this is maryland. teacher: this is west virginia, pennsylvania, delaware. every year marylanders spend five hundred and fifty million gaming at casinos in these other states. question seven will build a new casino and bring table games to baltimore... generating hundreds of millions for schools. and that money has to go to education. it's the law. so vote for question seven. so we can stop spending all that money here, and keep maryland money in classrooms like mine.
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>> hi, i'm here at the first annual helping parents to rock teleon the. work around the clock to help america's parents rediscover their bad ass selves. since the launch the campaign it's helped the lives of thousands of moms and dads. like sara from garden oak, new jersey who writes, before i called you guys i was waking up at 6:00 a.m. now i'm getting to bed at 6:00 a.m. thank you, helping parents to rock! we're saving lives here. what's going on in social media, gas money? >> alicia!
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>> tricked out family ride. keep rocking that's hot. importance of coloring inside the lines. you got a little michelangelo on your hands, baby. and took his young ones to a concert. that is crazy. that ain't boss. >> a situation developing. debbie in new mexico business to make a big mistake. deb? step away from the granny panties. smokein' mamas don't buy underwear in bulk. that was a close one. >> i use the crying out method, i use it for my children and so should you. all hail the dark lloyd. >> you can go back to the life you had, you can go back to the life you deserve. thanks for holding, i'm alicia keys. right. okay. i'm going to need to you get a hot tub and fill that [ bleep ]
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and our mobile apps are the ultimate in wherever whenever investing. no matter what kind of investor you are, you'll find the technology to help you become a better one at e-trade. >> dicky: from hollywood, it's "jimmy kimmel live"! tonight -- kevin james. ezra miller. and music from bloc party. with cleto and the cletones. and now, here we go again! here's jimmy kimmel! ♪ it's "jimmy kimmel live" [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: thank you, thank you. that's very nice. thank you. i'm jimmy, i'm the host of the show. thank you for watching, thank you for being here tonight.
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i just -- i have to say something, i just put a little purel on my hands so i'm as fresh clean as i can possibly be. it rained today here, which i think -- i think it's the first time it ever happened, right? [ laughter ] i know it sounds dumb but i actually went outside to look at the rain, it hasn't rained in so long. it looked wet. it's good. we need the rain in southern california to water our medical marijuana plants. the other nice thing is, when the rain lets up, you can go to the storm drains and pick your own chihuahua. thank you for braving the elements to join me on this journey of friendship and laughter tonight. tomorrow in l.a., we have something unusual going on. thousands of people all over town are expected to gather to watch the space shuttle "endeavor" roll through the streets of los angeles. last month, they flew it on the back of a 747 to l.a.
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it's been sitting there for the past few weeks and tomorrow, they're going to roll it through the streets of l.a. to the california science center where it will be on permanent display. the shuttle is five stories tall, weighs 77 metric tons, which is about 170,000 pounds. maybe they should have done this before gas prices went up to $5 a gallon. they're not rocket scientists -- oh, wait, they are. [ laughter ] the city is closing streets down to get the "endeavor" through. which will slow traffic down. you have to admit, space shuttle jam is a pretty awesome reason to be late for work. some of the businesses along the route aren't happy about the street closures, including the guy who owns randy's doughnuts. >> ron, who owns randy's donuts, the so-called mother of all parades as named by the mayor is more like the bummer of all parades because of the street closures and all the business he could have had. put a space shuttle in the middle of the donut. >> that's neat. really had fun putting that up there and enjoyed seeing the reaction. >> what happened?
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>> people say, oh, there's a space shuttle in your donut. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: and they're right. there is. [ applause ] why is his name ron? what happened to randy? i want randy back. today, by the way, is national coming out day. did you remember to call your -- [ applause ] did you remember to call your folks and tell them you're gay today? i hope so. national coming out day is traditionally followed by national "i knew it" day. and then next month is national awkward silence at thanksgiving dinner day. national coming out day is held on the third project runway of october. see, i would do, if i was in charge, i would have national coming out day on halloween because that way if your parents really freak out, you can say, just kidding, it's a costume. i'm just dressed as lady gaga. national coming out day has been around for 24 years. but in my opinion, it didn't
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become an official holiday until this year when it was finally given its own charlie brown holiday special. >> isn't there anyone who knows what national coming out day is all about? >> sure, charlie brown, i'll tell you what national coming out day is all about. national coming out day, ncod, is an internationally observed civil awareness day. celebrating individual whose publicly identify as gay, lesbian, bisexual or transgender. it seeks to promote greater awareness, tolerance and celebration of lgbt cultures. and its many sub cultures. from couples, chubbies, butches, s & m, rough trade, drag queens, muscle heads, lipstick, and that's what national coming out day is all about. now, let's dance, bitches. [ applause ]
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>> jimmy: snoopy and woodstock are more than just roommates. vice presidential debate between joe biden and paul ryan went on tonight in kentucky. there's a big age gap between these men. paul ryan is 42 and joe biden is either 60 or 80, i have no idea. vice president biden has a tendency to veer off-message. but he was very on-target preparing for font. >> biden has been out of sight for days, working in a delaware hotel with david axelrod and acting as ryan, congressman ryan van hollen. he's been fuelng up on gatorade and animal crackers. >> jimmy: what? and running around in circles, making airplane noises. it's like a snack break in the second grade. whatever it was, it worked because it seemed like someone spiked joe biden's ensure with five-hour energy drink or something. he was very fired up.
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a lot rougher than the presidential debate. they were going at each other like ronnie and sammy -- sorry, i was flipping between "jersey shore" and that. seemed to me that joe biden spent 80% of the debate trying not to curse. he actually said the word malarkey at one point. before tonight, we haven't seen paul ryan talk much. he's a very serious guy. paul ryan seems like the guy you see at the bank who really hates standing in line, like, so much, you're afraid he might do something. [ laughter ] the debate was very structured tonight, because president obama and mitt romney went way over their time limits, they put safety measures in place for this one to make sure it didn't happen again. i think they got this idea from award shows. >> this is a president who has gone out and done everything he has said he was going to do. this is a guy who has repaired our alliances so the rest of the world follows us again. this is a guy who brought the entire world, including russia and china to bring about the most devastating, most devastating -- ♪ [ applause ]
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>> jimmy: you know, he didn't even have time to thank his agent, which is a shame. "time" released some never before seen photos of paul ryan today and they are great. this is one of them. it's -- happy national coming out day, everyone! [ applause ] wish he was at the debate dressed like that. the pictures were taken last year. they would have been used if he was picked as "time's" person of the year last year. why would they make this his "person of the year" photo? it looks like the after shot on a billboard for lap band surgery. and why would he pose like this? i would rather have a sex tape released than these -- and that picture -- he looks like a backup dancer for 'nsync. the guy who guards the keg at a frat party. i love the backdrop here because it looks like he's working out in a sears portrait studio or something. this one is the best.
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this is the poster -- [ laughter ] the poster rush limbaugh has hanging over his bed. [ laughter ] his physique. you could cut medicare with that. we might possibly have our first vice president who kisses his biceps every morning. there was rumors today that a nude photo of justin bieber leaked. yesterday, justin bieber he tweeted that his computer and camera had been stolen while he was doing a concert. and then, a nude photo of him, or, i don't know, well, you look. look at this and you decide. is that -- i don't know, it doesn't look canadian to me. justin's fans are challenging the authenticity of the shot. they say the belly button and the nipples don't match. justin's real nipples are heart-shaped. i don't know if i you know that. obviously we can't show a naked picture whether it's justin or not. we asked some members of our studio audience tonight to draw
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what they think a naked picture of justin bieber would look like and i have some of them now. all right, we start with this one. this is from amanda campos of st. charles, illinois. you know what, the -- the bieber needs work, but i like the bathtub. all right. what else do we have here? this is -- it's either a toilet or the loch ness monster. okay, justin bieber at caesars palace, relaxes with prince hair by at a pool table in the nude. kind of cute. this is a little maple leaf underpant. this is from the popular cartoon, bieber and butthead. and -- this is my favorite. this is very -- minimalist. this is -- this is greg st. marie from snoqualmie, washington.
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where is greg? greg, nicely done. [ applause ] what was your inspiration here? >> what was my inspiration? >> jimmy: yeah. >> oh -- just not a huge bieber fan, i guess. >> jimmy: okay. would you mind signing this for me, because this one is going up in my home. >> oh, absolutelimmy: pass that, will you? thank you very much. thank you. and shame on you. this is pretty great. this is from fox 5 news last night in new york. their regular sports anchor was at the yankees playoff game, which left nonsports anchor gary alexander to do sports and you would never know this wasn't her area of expertise. >> we go, top of the 2, unloads on edwin jackson, saying, bye-bye. so long, farewell. four-three run bomb making it cardinals four and nationals, zero. that would be more than enough run support that right-hander chris carpenter would need, with
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missing almost the entire with nerve damage before returning on september 21st. carpenter threw a five, two-three inning shutout baseball as the cards blanked the nationals 8-0, taking a two games to one series lead. >> jimmy: very -- fastball to the head back in 2008. that was something. that good sports baseball score reporter. here's an alarming statistic i was unaware of. according to a new report, 40% of 911 calls made last year were accidental. last year, 911 operators got 100 million of what they call illegitimate calls, accidental calls from pocket dialing. that's when you forget to lock your cell phone and you accidentally make a call from your pants. huge problem for emergency responders. they are getting so many calls, they are having trouble keeping up with the real calls.
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they put out this psa today to make people more aware of this. >> accidental dialing is overwhelming america's 911 call centers, delaying first responders to real emergencies. this butt is responsible for 800 accidental calls. this one, 3,700 calls. and this monster? 7,400 accidental calls. your fat ass is killing people. hold the phone! this has been a message from your friendly 911 dispatcher. >> jimmy: that's nice. butt dialing. and one more thing, it's thursday night, it's time for our weekly tribute to the fcc where we bleep and blur things whether they need it or not. it is "this week in unnecessary censorship." >> and here in the situation room, happening now, mitt romney says president obama is [ bleep ] from behind. >> could mitt romney really [ bleep ] big bird. just the thought of it has pbs
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fans all [ bleep ] up. >> he's like a big [ bleep ] game. >> thanks for untangling it for us. >> big [ bleep ]. >> yeah, very big [ bleep ]. >> you know, this is our second season together, we didn [ bleep ] once in the first season. >> during a stop in florida, a restaurant owner wiped off mitt romney's [ bleep ] with some napkins. >> by the way, does charlie [ bleep ] an animal? >> name something tarzan might take off his loin cloth to do. >> to [ bleep ] off. >> entrusting you to retrieve the secret ingredient. and i need you to do this without any [ bleep ] ups. understand? >> mitt romney promised ohio voters [ bleep ] jobs if he's elected. >> my dad was a real [ bleep ]. >> i remember you in "rocky iii." i couldn't believe how big your [ bleep ] was. >> fire me? >> i will fire you. if you don't [ bleep ] me in this ring tonight. [ applause ]
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>> jimmy: tonight on the program, from the movie "the perks of being a wallflower," ezra miller is here. we have music from bloc party. and we'll be right back with kevin james, so stick around.
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it's very funny. and you are very muscular in the movie, like, i mean, like really, you look really muscular. >> not anymore. i -- the plan was, once i did the movie, i -- i did it a year and a half ago, i got in such great shape. after the movie, i'll relax a little bit and get back into shape when it comes time to do the talk shows and stuff so i look like the guy in the movie. >> jimmy: right. >> and then -- [ laughter ] i don't know if you know this, but taco bell came out with dorito locos -- have you tried these things? [ applause ] i got to tell you, man. i got to tell you. the outside shell is a dorito.
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it upended my life, i mean -- it's insane. and the other thing -- did you know you can freeze snickers? >> those in conjunction just kind of ruined me. >> jimmy: you have concerned suing these companies? >> they owe me something. >> jimmy: how long did you train to get in that shape? >> i trained about, like, 14 months, i started taking it real serious and started getting into it and going at it. and it was -- i did it like a real fighter. i wanted to really make it look real. >> jimmy: you were dieting -- >> i was drinking, yes. i cut out all, anything -- i became, like, vegan, almost. i was drinking greens to cut the weight and -- no, not woo. it was horrible. it was horrible. >> jimmy: most vegans don't have the energy to woo. >> yeah, yeah. it was horrendous. and even in the movie, i have to eat meat but i spit it out. it was basically when you have a dog and you put a biscuit on their nose and they sit there, they can't wait it. >> jimmy: your wife was pregnant at this time.
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>> she was. she's eating for two. i'm eating for not even half of one. plus i have other -- i have two little girls, too. and the food in my house is -- you can't stop it with kids. it's macaroni and cheese, hot dogs and this and that. they don't finish their food. >> jimmy: that's right. whatever -- so, you finished with that? >> i start with that, which is sad. they get it, you're not going to finish that, are you? >> jimmy: i know, it's a weird thing when you have kids. suddenly, like, put on 20 pounds, like, where did this come from? oh, the rest of the french fries. the rest of the mcnuggets. >> it's good for that, too. you can order food through your kids. at mcdonald's, you just go -- i'm not that hungry, but she's going to have five big macs. i don't want that, no, shut up. yes, she wants the supersized shake. all that stuff. >> jimmy: i heard you were at one time a personal trainer yourself. >> i was. i was a -- very long time ago and -- i wasn't very good, by the way. >> jimmy: you had clients? >> very short client list.
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you know what it was? i'd be like, you know what? i was like, five reps is more than enough. just the fact that you showed up today is showing me something. let's get a chocolate energy bar. >> jimmy: that's what i'm looking for. >> just one of those guys. >> jimmy: you trained with a guy who is an mma fighter. >> bas rutten. >> jimmy: good actor. >> he's fantastic in the movie. he's going to explode off of this. i'm so happy for him. he was a fighter himself. he became a ufc champ and he came out here to this country and he became friends together and we just had the greatest time and he would teach me everything and he trained me for this movie and it was awesome having him. >> jimmy: and you feel like now you can really handle yourself? >> i do. i feel really good. in fact, i actually have him here with us -- >> jimmy: you brought him here tonight. >> yes. >> jimmy: why did you bring him here tonight? >> i thought that it would be great to have him here because
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he's super in the movie but also, maybe to show you guys some, you know, down and dirty self-defense tricks that you can use. >> jimmy: i think that's great. >> you up for that, kimmel? >> jimmy: yeah, sure. [ applause ] >> let's go do that. >> jimmy: let's do it. oh, there he is. how you doing? >> good. >> jimmy: welcome, welcome. he's got the shirt, too. oh, is this the thing you do? should i take off my jacket, maybe? >> you might want to. >> jimmy: oh, all right. patronizing me. >> that's okay. what we're going to do here is show you a couple of scenarios that -- >> jimmy: oh, weapons. >> here you go. okay, with this. >> jimmy: all right. >> let me see now. let me see, ah -- groin strike! rake down. elbow to the face. neck strike. you're out. it's done.
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>> jimmy: yeah. >> it's over. i didn't -- [ applause ] >> jimmy: i wasn't expecting it to happen right away. >> i know. you know what that's called, jimmy? the element of surprise. >> well played, kevin. >> jimmy: all right. what else? >> here we go. okay. what this here is -- a gun. >> jimmy: the gun. >> if your assailant is to come at you with a gun, first thing you need to do is be very, very careful. safety first. >> yes. >> jimmy: okay -- >> you must do that. >> groin strike, groin strike. elbow. elbow. and rake, rip, strike, done! [ applause ] >> jimmy: all right. i think i got it. i'm almost unconscious. i think we -- we're done -- i
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think we're done. >> i'm sorry about that, but -- >> jimmy: so, what you're saying is, if you're in that situation, have your friend, the martial artist attack the guy from behind? >> what you do is, you use your surroundings. >> jimmy: okay, all right. >> so, we have one more demonstration, all right? >> jimmy: all right. >> okay. great. >> jimmy: oh, wow, look at that. it's a bear, huh? >> it's more than a bear, a bear with a knife, jimmy. >> jimmy: okay. all right. >> what i want you to do is, you are going to come at me with the bear, with the knife. >> jimmy: i'm going to come at you with the bear -- >> yes, with the knife. >> jimmy: push the bear towards you? >> you are going to make it happen in a second, but i also have to get ready, okay? you are going to thrust at me. i'm not afraid of it. i'm going to let it happen. oh, what showed up? what showed up?
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oh. >> jimmy: all right. [ applause ] you got a -- you have a bear with a gun. >> that's right. >> jimmy: okay. and, so -- should i attack your bear or? >> i'll tell you one thing. >> jimmy: or attack you. >> what you do is, any time you have a bear with a knife, you don't bring with a bear with a gun fight, okay? >> jimmy: that is true. >> that is rule number one in bear fighting. you do not do it. >> jimmy: what situation would you see this being? >> rawr! elbow! elbow! rake him. rake him! >> jimmy: we'll be right back with kevin james and bas rutten when we come back. we'll be right back. what's today's dare?
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